Friday, February 29, 2008

We are Spring

I wrote this for the Scientiae Carnival. The theme this month is renewal, hosted by skookumchick, who started the whole thing one year ago. Check it out!

My husband returned from a business trip this evening. I did truly miss him while he was gone, and not just because of the tasks that went undone or that I had to take over because of his absence. I think something has shifted between us, and the spirit of teamwork has been revived.

I recently went to a major conference to present my research for the first time outside of my university. I was away for four days, and if you had been in our home in the week before you would think that I was leaving forever. It was endless requests to make sure this or that was done before I left. It was teary eyes and, “you’re going to be gone HOW many days?” I could understand that everyone who was cognizant of what was about to happen was nervous about how things would keep running smoothly without me. But I found this to be almost comical – because I don’t really think things run that smoothly when I am around, so I wasn’t really expecting there to a noticeable difference while I was away. I had faith that hubby could handle it. Plus, after three plus years of keeping it together while hubby worked in another city all week have only taught me that the stuff that doesn’t matter outweighs the stuff that does.

So I went to the conference feeling a tad bitter about how the lead up had gone. And the bitterness really stayed with me for too long, even when hubby told me he had a new appreciation for how hard it was while he was away all week. I really wished I could just let it go, but I couldn’t do it. Not all at once, anyway.

But it did slowly melt away. I found myself in his shoes all too soon, facing the prospect of his week-long trip, while struggling to finish the preparations for the accursed guest lecture. He was quietly supportive of this endeavor – the coffee flowed abundantly. When the lecture didn’t happen, he bought me a drink and listened as I vented my frustrations. I fussed over his packing and tried to help him find space to prepare for trip. I missed him while he was gone. And when he returned last night, I found myself wanting to take care of him, even though I was exhausted from the week with the two Things with no back-up. Last night, after he collapsed with Thing 2 resting in the crook of his elbow, I knew that we had pulled through a mighty rough patch by working together.

It’s been a year, now, since hubby found a job in [New City] and it has been harder than either of us anticipated readjusting to living together full time. Though spring has not yet sprung in our neck of the woods, I feel that feeling of promise that for me defines the beginning of spring. It’s when the snow is melting, the air is damp, and the sun shines in a blue sky filled with puffy white clouds. The buds are so tiny, you can barely see them, but before you know it, they will be in full flower.

1 comment:

ScienceMama said...

What a lovely lovely post. Thank you so much for sharing!